Posts Tagged “freedom”

Unstable over at This is Uncensored Territory Baby keeps coming up with posts on therapeutic exercises that are so spot on.  This exercise is no different. A Declaration of Permission. Apparently it’s not secret now that I find these therapeutic, although I’m still chickening out on the letter to my m other one. LOL

First bits first.  Just what are the things that I can’t/don’t/won’t because I secretly feel I feel I can’t do because I’d explode or the world would end or whatever and why can’t/don’t/won’t I? Things I have unreal rules for myself about? (Hey BorderLife, sounds like, more on myths, eh? By gum, I think it is!)

Why can’t/don’t/won’t I….

… and I draw a complete blank.

Ok, let’s get simpler. WHAT can’t/don’t/won’t I????  Blank again.

[I had started this post, then stopped here in the draft for days. This morning I finally got it going, after last night being reassured by the fact that Unstable was having the same issues with it. It's good to hang together when the going is tough. Even out here in cyberland.]

Uh, why’s this so hard. I seem to think I can, do will do anything and everything and there are no things I feel I’d explode about or something similarly sinister and no rules about my conduct stuffed into my head.

Oh. Exercise.

The old “rule”… Moving around is dangerous and someone will come molest you or hurt you some way.

Immi, I give you permission to exercise without worrying that anyone will hurt you.

Anger.  And now it’s moving.


The old “rule”, the mental myth … Getting angry is dangerous. I might do something dangerous or explode, or someone might do something horrid to me if I get angry.

Immi, I give you permission to feel angry at anyone any time whether it’s reasonable or not, without being overwhelmed by the feeling.  
(I don’t give you permission to be violent with them, but have at all the anger you want sweet.)

The old “rule”, the mental myth … I have to fit in so they don’t notice me and do something abusive to me.

Immi, I give you permission to look any way you do without worrying what others will think.  Yes, that includes wearing Winnie the Pooh t’s with frightening jewelry if that’s what you want or doing your hair in the latest bedhead style.

The old “rule”, the mental myth … If someone compliements me they’ve noticed me and they’re lying to me or getting ready to do something abusive to me. The very rare times that isn’t so, it’s jinxing me so that I’ll get abused.

Immi, I give you permission to be complimented on anything about you without feeling it’s undeserved or you’re somehow being jinxed by it.


The old “rule”, the mental myth … I am horrible and don’t deserve to feel good because I’m so horrible.

Immi, I give you permission to feel good about yourself no matter what. Nuff said.

The old “rule”, the mental myth … I can’t say no because it’s bad and I’m horrible.

Immi, I give you permission to say no in any situation you need or want to say no.

The old “rule”, the mental myth … I deserve nothing good.

Immi, I give you permission to say yes to things you want to do, have,  and be.

The rules and myths we have to live by are so deeply buried they’re just part of life. When they get dug up and brought to light, thoughI think I’ll have to go find a permission slip pad and put these on the wall nearby. These days the myths are smaller and farther away than ever. I know they’re still engrained, though. All the things I learned by the time I  was 3 or 4 are, so it’ll take longer to un-engrain them and put new things in their place. Such is the lot of those with bpd, c-ptsd, or who just plain were abused as children, or maybe abused at all. It’s good to start un-entraining them and finding new things to live by, though. To get away from them even some is a great freedom.



Babbled by Immi.


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Stand up and be counted. Nuff said.


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9/27/08 through 10/4/08 is Banned Books Week and the start of that week is a good time for a break from spelunking in my past. I’m all for Banned Books Week. Yes, I read banned books.  Always have. And unless the right to read things is taken away from me, always will.  Of course, if the right to read things is taken away from us, you probably won’t be reading my blog any more.  It would no doubt be banned. I don’t agree with censorship.

The rule for reading when I was growing up was: If you’re able to read it, you’re allowed to read it.  One of the things my parents did well I think, though I think perhaps a few explanations along the way would have been a good idea.  I’m well aware other parents have other rules, and I’m ok with that. Parents have a right to raise their children any non-abusive way they want, as far as I’m concerned. And if closed groups want to ban books, well, that’s up to them. If parents want to ban books from their homes, or closed groups removed them from their shelves, I don’t feel I have a right to complain of it.  However, when their opinions reach into the public sphere at large, it’s gone too far.  I do feel that categorically removing them from public schools and libraries is against the whole concept of freedom. Being allowed to read anything gave me much more of an open mind and encouraged me to learn and read more. Perhaps it warped me, but I think learning and being open-minded are generally good things, even if the house is peppered with banned books.

Want to know more about Banned Books Week?  To join in or to criticize?  ALA’s Office of Intellectual Freedom has more information at its blog. You can also find more info, at BannedBooksWeek.org and a free list of challenged, banned and removed books for 2007-2008 at the Illinois Library Association website.

Some of the books that have been challenged, banned or removed over time strike me as particularly odd.  Harry Potter??? Huckleberry Finn??? For goodness sake!

  • The Golden Compass (Philip Pullman)
  • Harry Potter and the Socerer’s Stone (J.K. Rowling)
  • Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (J.K. Rowling)
  • Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (J.K. Rowling)
  • Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (J.K. Rowling)
  • Of Mice and Men (John Steinbeck)
  • The Color Purple (Alice Walker)
  • Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland (Charles Dodgson aka Lewis Carroll)
  • I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings (Maya Angelou)
  • To Kill a Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
  • The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (Mark Twain)
  • The Joy Luck Club (Amy Tan)
  • The DaVinci Code (Dan Brown)
  • Farenheit 451 (Ray Bradbury)
  • Deenie, Forever (Judy Blume)
  • Hamlet, MacBeth, King Lear (by Shakespeare)
  • and oodles more have been banned around the world at various times.
I wonder if we’re any better as a society now than the ones of the middle ages sometimes. I’ve read all the banned/challenged books listed here, and many more besides.  I don’t think they made me bipolar or hives or alcoholism or gave me complex PTSD, though.  I don’t recall any books slithering in my ears to screw around with my brain or genetics, stuffing alcohol in my face, or abusing me as a child.  Read a banned book. I doubt it will give you hives or a mental illness either. Particularly Harry Potter. (Harry Potter banned??? sheesh!)
Restriction of free thought and free speech is the most dangerous of all subversions. It is the one un–American act that could most easily defeat us.” – William O. Douglas

For a grin to leave you with… My most favorite banned books incident happened when I was finally old enough to vote.  
Picture a henna-haired art student in holey jeans, tshirt and jean jacket standing covered in buttons in line at the polling precinct.  She is reading a book.  That was me.
A conservative looking lady was behind me in the line.  She did not have a book, and out of the blue she said, “I know who you’re voting for.”  I looked up from my book, surprised. I thought the lady was strange and not terribly pleasant. I knew I had a right to not tell anyone who I was going to vote for.  She smiles and pointed to a button on my jean jacket.  It said “I Read Banned Books”. I just laughed.  I guess I know who she voted for too.



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