Telling about bipolar disorder when dating
Posted by Immi in bipolar, mental illness, stigma
Stigma about mental illness can be subtle or obvious, and it can hit us from behind at times. Bradley of How Is Bradley and Uncle Bradley’s Words of Wisdom, recently wrote an article that goes right to the heart of an issue that many of us with bipolar disorder wrestle with — when to tell someone about bipolar disorder or other mental illness.
The stigma of bipolar disorder can be daunting in dating and relationships. Unfortunately sometimes people don’t see us as human beings but rather as our illness. That’s not even remotely fair, and many are working to education the public. In the meanwhile, it can help to know ahead of time how we want to deal with it.
Dear Uncle Bradley, I want to date, or I just started dating. When do I tell said date that I am bipolar, unipolar? Do I bring it up at all? What if I am rejected?
Signed, AnonymousExcellent question, Anonymous. If you are just dating someone then I personally see no reason to bring it up at all. Just enjoy your dates, and if you have those emotional times when you can’t handle it then just tell your date you don’t feel well and can’t go out.
If you are dating someone with the assumption or hope that it will develop into something more then that’s an entirely different story. …
Bradley goes on to say that when the dating relationship starts to get deeper, then is probably the time to tell, as true relationships do best when based on honesty. You can see the rest of the article here.
Generally speaking, my take on it is that the more bipolar disorder is likely to affect someone personally because of a close relationship, then it’s better to tell them about it. Though stigma may happen, I believe it’s best to get past it than to just pray someone never finds out about our mental illness. For me, that applies to all of life, as well as dating.
Babbled by Immi.
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An excellent topic. I wonder, when I get back into the dating world, how this will affect me. But I think the more pressing issue is getting through the “what do you do?” phase and the “I’m on a disability pension” phase. That freaks me out way more than saying, “I have a mood disorder.”
Are you on Facebook, BTW? I should check out your networks I see on your little badge thingy here.
WC – I can relate. I find it much easier to say I’m bipolar than I can hardly keep myself afloat financially most days. Glad to hear I’m not alone in that sort of thing. And yes, I’m on Facebook as Immi Themad.
that is a GREAT image. it speaks volumes.
congrats on this new blog!
Thanks, Isabella!